Meet Soley, she lives in Iceland, and had been through the ringer with pregnancy loss. Not only with her body, but her experience with those who had treated her during the losses.
The best decision she made was to find the right, most qualified and compassionate doctor for her family planning dreams and follow his advice.
She researched and fortunately received care from Dr. Harvey Kliman at Yale University.
Before Soley met Kliman, she was told by many people, including physicians, “that there was something wrong with her.” Like most would, she started to believe it.
Fault was placed on her for the pregnancy losses. Misdirected fault, that is.
She was reassured by Kliman that it was not her fault, and if you have or are experiencing pregnancy loss — it is not your fault either.
Soley was told this was wrong:
- Her diet
Then, when she changed her diet, it didn’t help. What was she told was wrong then?
- Her exercise
Her lack of exercise was playing a factor. It wasn’t that.
Upon meeting, Kliman told Soley, “‘Look, I am going to figure out why you have these losses and invariably over 90% are due to genetic reasons, and that’s what her reason was.’”
He also was candid with her as to what to expect going forward.
“I told her she has a recurrence risk of [pregnancy loss of] about 50%.”
This statistic applies to anyone that has had recurrent (2 or more) pregnancy losses.
Turns out to be quite close… 7 losses, 4 children.
He told her:
- “You don’t need any treatment;
- There is nothing wrong with you;
- You simply need to try again when you are emotionally ready.”
No unnecessary treatment prescribed; no guilt shaming; just profound advice from a seasoned expert.
Finding an OB/GYN or fertility doctor that is compassionate and knowledgeable is worth the time and effort. Not only does your future baby depend on it, but you as a person trying to conceive, carry and birth a child.
What happened next?
“When she was emotionally ready, she tried again and had twins naturally.” A healthy pregnancy “can work out” Kliman said.
If a genetic issue is identified by Kliman, he has this conversation with all the couples he works with. “I know it’s difficult, but simply try again. Because there is nothing we can do to change that probability of pregnancy loss.”
More resources on pregnancy loss can be accessed here: https://medicine.yale.edu/profile/harvey-kliman/?tab=news.
Kliman hopes this real life pregnancy story is “very heartening and reassuring” for women desiring a child. “I just want to let couples know, especially women who carry pregnancies, that have losses at any stage, that it is not their fault.”
It was an honor to interview Dr. Harvey Kliman. Kliman is a research scientist in the department of Obstetrics, Gynecology, and Reproductive Sciences at the Yale University School of Medicine as well as the Director of the Reproductive and Placental Research Unit. He has received many awards and recognition, including the Star Award Stillbirth Research in 2019.
Yale University and Stanford University are the two centers conducting important research to better understand the relationship between genetics and pregnancy losses.
This website does not provide medical advice. No material on this site is intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. It is for informational purposes only. Always seek the advice of a medical professional or other qualified health care provider on any health matter or question.
Watch for more from Dr. Harvey Kliman in the coming weeks.